Wrote the embassy again, still no date set. /sigh
Maybe I should have stayed home a little longer … /sigh
I landed in Kingston last night at 7:30 local time. My parents had been waiting since 6:30ish … I thought that was 2 hours since my clock and my body is still on Daylight time … but it turned out to be more like 1 hour – still a long time for them to wait at that madhouse of an airport, but not as bad as I first thought it to be. I worry about them, it has been their practice for ALL my life to call the airline first to confirm the arrival time, yesterday, they didn’t bother. /sigh
It feels odd to be here… here where I have spent almost all of my life, in this house … nevermind the room is different, it still feels odd… like I AM visiting. The comforts of my life are still around, like my square mug, and my old bed … but its not the same. The little house in KY has become home in less than 12 weeks … in a way that NO other house or apartment has in ALL my life here in Jamaica. It is SO odd.
Bear apparently has adjusted to getting his cuddles from daddy since mommy seems to have disappeared. That’s good … they BOTH need cuddles, so it’s good they’ve found each other now without me being in the way. Me being there at home all the time was interfering with their bonding I think – so now they get a chance to do that. /sigh I miss them BOTH. /sniff
My parents, of course, were ecstatic to see me …. and completely out of character for them, showed it. They have never been the most demonstrative of parents … last night, they were demonstrating for ALL to see. That was nice.
I now have to make lists, lists of places I need to go, things I need to get done …. it’s not going to be an easy time and I just hope it’ll be over soon enough. Today, I lay low. Tomorrow I chance the road (after not driving for 10 weeks or so, I am a little hesitant to take it on in one fell swoop), then Monday I start in earnest. I have to tell you, this break has done me a WORLD of good. I am much more relaxed, much more able to take on stuff. I am ready.
Anywho, going to finish catching up with peoples, and then unpack, make my lists and start making plans. I’ll check in with you all laterz.
There’s been a couple of nice things that has happened… and a couple of not so nice things.
The Easter weekend just passed, and the one thing from this weekend that has stuck out in my head is the bowling night with hubby’s office. We all headed to the local bowling alley and rolled some balls together. It was kinda fun … it seemed to me that they all felt more obligated to be there than anything else … but I guess that’s kind of how everybody feels with their work colleagues, eh? I think they picked the wrong night, actually … it was Friday and everybody has their plans for Friday nights. Even Good Friday nights. I gotta tell ya, it seems less of a big deal here than it does back in Jamaica, Good Friday. Work as usual, play as usual … life as usual. I think they make a bigger splurge of Valentine’s and Christmas. Sad.
So anyway, I hit one strike (for the newbs, that’s all 10 pins down in one ball – sorta hard to do, especially when you’re a novice), and a couple of 9pins …. all the other rolls were pretty sad – I even missed all 10 pins in one play. Sad. Hubby was the winner overall I think – and that’s cos he’s the boss. Just kidding … hubby is good at games like that, so he shone. And I was proud.
Then when we were all getting ready to shove off for home after a night of rolling balls …. hubby disappears for a few minutes. Then he comes back with his hand behind his back … at the door, he brings out his hand … you know, like in the cartoons when the guy brings flowers out from behind his back and they kind of just burst forth … ? yea, like that … and in his hand, THE cutest bunny wabbit I have seen in a LONG time. A blue bunny wabbit, with a ribbon around his neck printed with carrots … I thought it was the sweetest thing he’s done yet. Beaming all the way to Kingston tomorrow.
Which is one of the bad things, I already am starting to cry on and off and it’s a good 24 hours yet before I head to the airport. I don’t know HOW I am going to manage with this last separation, but I DO know it’ll be the worst yet. /sigh Hubby walks in the door yesterday, folds me into his arms and says “I don’t want you to go” …. /sigh Ya. That makes me feel TONS better, hun. /sigh
Anywho, these last few days have been taken with getting as much of him into my system as I can – and I mean that in the purest of ways (Git yer mind outta the gutter, DJ!) … we just been spending time talking and cuddling and watching TV.
Which brings me to the next honest-to-goodness sweet thing hubby did fer me. I been hankering after watching “I Am Legend” since it was released. Every opportunity I have to say it, I do … just cos I really like Will Smith and the movie looked to be pretty awesome and I had heard such controversial reviews, that it just struck me as one that was NOT to pass me by. It seemed like hubby wasn’t in the least bit interested … and he kept saying things like “Really?” and “I can’t imagine why” when I’d mention wanting to see it.
Saturday morning, he says “Maybe we’ll watch a movie together tonite for a change”. Of course, we’ve seen what he has already … some of them many times over, so I ask “What’ll we watch?” and he says “Mmmm, I dunno … I’ll think of something” and I leave it at that.
Movie time and he tells me to go get us some munchies and drinks while he slips in the movie and I am not to peak! Of course, now I am intrigued. When I finally round the corner into the living room, there it is up on screen “I Am Legend”! I am shocked speechless! “Honey! How long have you had this?” … the smile “I picked it up the last time we were at the store.” … and the suspicious response “When did you pick that up? Where was I?” another smile … “Shut up, why don’tcha, and just enjoy the show?!” *snicker*
Yup … I hit the jackpot, ladies and gentlemen! The jackpot! How’d *I* get so lucky?
Well, the last leg of this journey starts tomorrow. When next I touch these shores, I’ll be here for good and I can’t WAIT. I have flourished here for some off reason .. I can actually see my own face glow … which says a lot. I get enough sleep, I am relaxed, I am so happy …. I think, my friend, that I have finally found home. And you know what? I don’t know that it has anything much to do with the geographical location at all … I think it has a lot more to do with hubby than anything else. Which is another strange thing, since *I* am a creature of habit normally … you’d think that this whole moving thing would be a terrible adjustment. So far, it’s been pretty easy – the moving part. Already my head and heart think of this as home … I think the hardest part of this move will be the inevitable leaving of my native-land, having to find my working feet on completely new ground and getting used to the completely different cultures here .. home? That’s the easy part.
SO! I felt so much better, I got up and took a shower and washed my hair. Now I’m wondering if that was such a good idea. Considering I am still sniffling and coughing, I probably should have waited a day or 2 more before sitting around the cold house with wet hair down my back. But seriously, my head was itching SO bad and it was just really bugging me and I mean … I FELT better. I did. Shhhh – don’t tell honey-sunshine that I am sneezing and coughing more now that I have washed it. I’ma take some airbourne here in a minute and I’ll be all better by the time he gets home later.
Still feeling good, I’m also doing some laundry … which meant that the stuffed bear that was sitting on top of the washing machine got relocated to one of the tables in the living room. Bear, of course, was fascinated with it … and I am sure he sniffed every inch of that bear – head to toe – before he went back into hiding for his midday nap. It confirmed to me, tho, that maybe Bear needs a little brother or sister. Something to think about for when I am back here for good.
In 10 days, I fly to Kingston … THAT is going to be TORTURE. But I keep consoling myself that it’s for a short time and I will be back here with my little family before I can blink twice. I sure am going to miss honey-sunshine and Bear. But I’ll probably be too busy to think much about it. I have lots to do when I get back there. And lots to think about and plan for when I come back. /sigh
Anywho – I better go finish dealing with my hair … having washed it, it now needs neatening. /sigh
Ah – the idle life. I am going to be VERY sad to leave it behind.
So, I’m sick again. Yea. We just keep passing the germs around among ourselves. Seems everybody at honey-sunshine’s office has this cold and we just keep swapping germs in and out and around. Went out on Thursday, found the Barnes and Noble and a couple other cool stores, and came home. Decided a nice warm shower and a nap sounded good before honey-sunshine got home. Well, I managed the shower … and I manage to lay down … but I just couldn’t get up again. I felt so HEAVY and EXHAUSTED. It was weird. Next thing I know I am sniffling and coughing once again.
Been pretty much down and out for the last couple of days. Up for an hour or two at a time, but for the most part, I been laying down and/or sleeping.
Bear’s suddenly become entranced with his water bowl. We got him one of those ones that has a bottle thingy upsides down which uses pressure to release water periodically. It means I don’t have to be filling his bowl 2 or 3 times a day with water. For some reason, he is suddenly fascinated with it. He’ll sit there and watch it, putting his front paws in the bowl, sniffing at the bottle, trying to stick his nose inside to see where the water comes from … he’s so cute.
/sigh So tired, so achy …. I’ma lay down again in a bit.
Tired … oh so tired … from what? No idea.
Yesterday, honey-sunshine dug the car out of the snow and we headed off to the store cos we ran out of kitty litter. Bear had been telling me that his litterbox was grungy, so I washed it out but there wasn’t enough litter to refill it. So off we went.
Terrible … after all that pretty white powdery snow, it was wet and slushy and grungy out there. ugh. And still is … all the snow is melting and it just looks … ugh now. Of course, it being Sunday, the store was “rampacked” =) … stuffed to the doors … “corked” … you know … crowded. Honey-sunshine was not pleased – he despises crowds as much as I do. =) But we managed anyway and back home, I finished the litter, made us lunch and settled in for the day.
Imagine our shock to realize that 3pm wasn’t really 3pm at all! It was 4pm … and we had just about half hour before the honey-sunshine had to leave for work. Somehow, we missed that we had “sprung forward” on Saturday night. I think the only thing that saved us was the fact that I had seen somewhere that it was time to change time … and it just struck a chord in my mind when we realized it was an hour later. So that kinda threw off everything.
I am still trying to figure out why DST is still a necessity in this day and age. It seems like a waste of … something. Stupid tradition, changing the hours twice a year to “save daylight”. Speaking of stupidity … being here with honey-sunshine these last 2 months reminded me of another so-called “pet peeve” … the whole idea that men should put the toilet seat back down afterwards …. er, I wonder if it occurs to anybody that the men have to lift the damn thing in the first place and that it’s not unreasonable to expect the same effort when its time for us to use it. How difficult is it to just put the seat down anyway? Sheesh!
Huh? What you say? Courtesy? Sure! I’m not gonna argue with that … it’d be “nice” to not have to put the seat down, but it’d be nice to not have to shovel snow or scoop kitty litter too, wouldn’t it? Chill out, there are far more serious issues that need thrashing out than whether the toilet seat is up or down for us … I am willing to bet on it. Any couple who can say their most serious issue is the toilet seat up or down is the perfect couple and can I please have their autograph.
There was an article in the local weekly paper a couple of weeks a-back. The title? “Contempt for spouse, career, signals divorce” and it spoke of the early signs of a marraige heading for divorce when there is either a feeling or evidence of the feeling of contempt for the spouse and their career. It made reference to one of the tax commercials that was airing on US TV stations at the time – the one with the wife making fun of the husband who had bought a software program to do their taxes resulting in not having “people” to refer to for advice. Yea – that kinda contempt means that marraige is almost over. Either she will just decide to leave, or he will get sick of being made fun of in that way.
Wow, have I strayed! Where did that come from? Whew. Enough soap-boxing already … I need coffee. You all have a great day and a great week, y’hear?
So you heard me say I wanted more snow … right? Well, maybe I only said it indirectly but I wanted it. Now that I have it …
It’s like … WHOA! Can I take that back please?
It’s been snowing non-stop for over 24 hours now. We’re under over a foot of snow, the town is shutdown, emergency vehicles only on the main highway through town …. snowbound. Imagine that.
On the flip side, not having to go out in it makes it ‘oh so pretty’ for me. Sitting in my warm living room, covered in a blanket, cuddling with Bear and watching the snow coming down outside was so idyllic I wanted to cry. I got up and made coffee instead – the perfect addition to a near-perfect morning.
Course, I had to shovel the walk this morning. Well, I didn’t HAVE to, but I thought it’d be a nice gesture to send honey-sunshine off to work on a walk he could see and not have to guess at. At the curbside, I paused to look back over my work, and there was honey-sunshine at the upstairs-bathroom window, waving and shouting “Hi honey. You’re doing great!” …. ha! Easy for him to say. Of course all that work is now lost since the walk is fully covered again, but I feel good that I did a fairly good job anyway.
Bear is fascinated with the snow. He spent ALL morning just gazing at the flakes coming down out there, occasionally chattering to the odd bird that appeared lost in the flurries. Twice he attempted to catch the flakes and fell behind the couch, but he was back up and at em in an instant… silly kitty.
Anyways…. I’ma head back in front of the TV, with the window beside me and the blanket over my legs for another lazy spell.
Warm thoughts all.
Classic Bear. Isn’t he a sweetie-pie? /sigh I love this kitty.
So, yesterday, we both geared ourselves to take him to the vet. I still have memories of taking my only other kitty love to the vet … hell, I still have some of the scars. The Howling Wind (Windy for short) was a rambunctious kitty, not at all like Bear and he clawed his way through the vet visit that I insisted on doing. Literally. Bear? COMPLETE opposite. I felt SO sorry for him the WHOLE way to and back. Poor kitty was so scared … but he behaved like a good little kitty too. He didn’t cry, he didn’t claw, he didn’t cower (too much) and he didn’t lose control of himself either. He was SUCH a trooper. Tho he did hide for about 4 hours after we came back, he’s pretty much back to normal today – demanding his cuddles and being the silly lovable kitty that he is.
He went into the carrier with little trouble. He doesn’t really like being picked up and hugged, so he wanted down as soon as I picked him up. But he went into the carrier and only made on half-assed attempt to get out. It’s like the apology in our voices was evident and he sensed that altho unpleasant, this was something he was going to have to just tolerate. It was raining and unfortunately, not wanting to race from the front door to the car meant he got a little sprinkled. So that was the first scamper to bury his head in the catnip-covered towel I put in the carrier for him.
The ride was uneventful and he settled down for it fairly well. No more scampering, tho he was still quite scared. The vet was the worst part. Right away, I realized it was the voices that got him started. The receptionist and a couple of other people had him shaking within minutes. By the time the dog walked through the door, he was frantic … his tongue between his lips, he was literally scared to bits. He settled down a bit tho once the dog was gone and the strange voices went away. The constant chatter and assurances from honey-sunshine and I helped I am sure …
The exam was actually surprisingly good. The vet loved him, thought he was a “sweet little thing”. He allowed me to hug and stroke him while the vet examined scanned him, and he stood very still while she examined him. And then issued one little anguished squeak when he got the shot looking up at me pleadingly. But we got him back into his carrier almost immediately and he buried his head in his towel again and that was that.
He settled down very well on the ride back, even resting his nose up against the cage to be stroked. Of course, as soon as he got home and the door opened, he shot out and behind the couch where he stayed until much MUCH later. He came out and mewed at me and pawed my arm – his usual gesture when he wants a little love. So I gave him a little, but he decided he didn’t want it anymore – also typical and went to stick his nose out the window. It was still raining and that apparently is fascinating to him.
So all-in-all, a productive day albeit somewhat anguished … we got it done. /sigh
Just before I fell asleep last night, I heard him giving the toys hell downstairs … so I am sure he is none-the-worse for the experience and all the better off. Such a good kitty he is.
Ok … enough Bear-talk … I’m out.
Someone snapped at me today and it reminded me SO much of how I used to snap at people … just a couple of months ago. And something hit me … our entire existence has become about the THINGS in our lives and not so much the PEOPLE. My problem used to be that I had so much to think about and accomplish and people just kept bugging me for more and more commitments. It got to be so much; too much to handle almost. And so I ended up snapping at people left, right and center for little things.
I remember my supe telling me that people liked me but that they were never sure what mood I might be in and how to best approach me. People usually waited to see what mood I was in first just so that they didn’t get their heads bitten off.
That must have been a pretty difficult situation to be in. Like approaching the lion in his den and never sure whether today is the day he bites your head off, or just snarls in your general direction … or whether today he will actually be sleeping or just lazy enough to allow you to do what you have to.
Anyway, the point was this: I am going to make an EXTRA special effort from here on out to NOT be snippy with people, regardless of how agitated or annoyed or depressed or angry I am. I did make this promise to my adopted sis, that I would think before I struck out in anger .. give into that knee-jerk reaction …. and I think I am actually doing better at that …. but this experience has just driven it home.
The person who is at the receiving end has NO idea what’s going on in my head, and really can’t be expected in any reasonable way to understand and commiserate with my state of mind. Yea… I gotta remember my own deer-in-headlights feeling today and try and keep that in mind the next time I am ready to let go on someone.
Sshhh DJ … don’t think I don’t hear you back there muttering about DNA again. hmph!